Today’s soundtrack: I speak very very um, fluent Spanish
Today at 8:02pm: me, a mop and some Mr. Clean


This is why doing business with Japanese clients can occasionally be a pain in the ass. Today I’m on the phone with the design firm I did the bag project through:


ME: So will I be getting copies of the bags? And I’ve got some friends already interested in ordering some.

DESIGN FIRM GUY: Uh, I’m not sure. I’m not sure which ones are in production anymore.

ME: “Anymore?” I thought the product launch wasn’t until next week.

DFG: No, this is just the gallery event. They started making the bags last year.

ME: Last year! Why didn’t--wait, so why am I going out there?

DFG: The client is flying you out there for the gallery event and the magazine interviews because that was part of the contract.

ME: Well, did my bags at least sell well?

DFG: Um, I’m not sure which ones were actually made.

ME: What?

DFG: One of the other designers on the project, J____, handed in some really conceptual designs, and they didn’t even make it past the prototype stage. The manufacturer looked at them and was like “These are too bugged out, we can’t sell these.” So none of his stuff made it into stores.

ME: Did my bags get made?

DFG: I don’t know.

ME: Listen...is there a chance I’m going to fly all the way to Japan and find out not a single one of my bags even saw production?

DFG: Um...I don’t know. Let me e-mail the client and find out. But the gallery show should still be cool, all of your design sketches will be blown up and displayed on the walls....

Fucking A, man. If they started making the bags last year, why didn’t the client send me a goddamn e-mail saying so?

A year is a long time, and in terms of Japanese product cycles it’s an eternity. More than enough time has gone by for my bag to have hit the racks, perhaps caught on and become trendy, then flamed out completely. The worst part is the not knowing.

Wait a sec, that’s not true. The worst part is I told Komichi I had something to show her. If she actually shows and those bags ain’t there, what the hell am I gonna pull out of my ass? A card trick?


ME: And...tada! The Ace of Spades! Sugoi ne.

SHE: Er...Kenji and I should be going.

KENJI: Your ex-boyfriend flew all the way here from New York to show you the Ace of Spades?

SHE: I told you he was weird. Let’s go, honey.

Well, this certainly puts a different spin on the trip. Here I am thinking I’m attending a product launch--I totally planned on hanging out in the store and stealthily observing customers checking out the bags--and now I find out they might not even have been made.

Don’t get me wrong, I ain’t complaining; crossing an ocean for any reason is good. And I cranked out five designs, so at least a couple of them have to have been made. I hope.

I tried looking at the client’s website to see if they had product listings, but the whole thing was in Japanese, and Yuka’s out tonight. (If anyone out there can read Japanese and is bored enough to check, their site is: http://www.unifa.jp/ and the NYC company I did the project through is Staple Design. The gallery event--what I thought was going to be the product launch--is on Tuesday, May 11th at a Tokyo gallery called “Space Force.”)

Figured out the first part of what I’m going to read Friday, now I have to cook or re-heat the second half. I’ve only got five minutes on stage so I want to make it good. I’ve been going through old journal entries trying to find something I like that will fit the time-frame.

I’m really looking forward to the gig because the pressure’s distributed. Even if I blow it, there are 29 other cats who are bound to bring it.

I’m still seeking donations for the Canada trip, but THANK YOU to everyone who already took the time and effort to donate! I’m probably 30-40% of the way towards paying for the second half of it. I think. I don’t know how much Canadian taxes and food costs are so I’ve just estimated.

Some donations are still coming in, though it’s dropped off dramatically; I’m not sure if that means I’m out of donors or if I have to “advertise” more. I don’t want to beat people over the head with it, you know?

Anyways I spent a couple hours today trying to map out different options for the trip, which is a little trickier than I thought. Will post news and maybe some kind of graphic once I get it together. I’m also thinking of re-posting some older trips so newcomers could see them.

Gotta hit the sack, I’ve got a full plate tomorrow. Tonight in my dreams I’m going to be wearing five familiar bags on a train moving through unfamiliar territory. And out of all the girls I meet, none of them have rings on their fingers.