Today’s soundtrack: everything is everything
Today at 10:02am: Spitting out Christine’s horrendous coffee.


Mike’s sister is crashing at our place. She’s a great gal but she sure can’t make a cup of coffee.


Against my wishes I watched Shallow Hal on DVD and it was actually entertaining. At face value, this movie and the movie Shrek appear to be polemics about superficial beauty but are in fact tales about fat people succeeding. I think.

Also saw Vanilla Sky, which wasn’t necessarily a good movie but to me, was one of those movies you have to see, at least for the pop-cultural literacy.

The freakishly fantastic shot of Times Square in the beginning is fucking amazing, especially to me as a New Yorker. Ranks right up there with the Grand Central “ballroom” scene in The Fisher King. Scenes like those are something I think all New Yorkers secretly dream of.

Now that Mike lives down the hall with Yuka, me and Shady have an extra living room. When bored we go down to Mike’s photo studio. The three of us sink into the couches and listen to Patsy Cline and stare at the ceiling like potheads. We have arguments about lesbians or Hong Kong movies or martial arts systems. Sometimes Mike will put on a wig and a jumpsuit for no good reason. Also I’m allowed to smoke in there.

Other times he goes digging through his boxes and produces amusingly old photographs of us. Mike and Shady knew each other before I’d met them so they have a little more history. There are the photographs where I’m in them, then it goes back to the pre-Rain period. There’s an old snapshot of the two of them with Angus (from AC/DC) they especially prize. Around the same time I was living in Brooklyn, dating a Puerto Rican girl and I had a Caesar and a hoop through my ear. I was pretty gay-looking by today’s standards.

[disclaimer: While the word “gay” is commonly understood to mean “homosexual,” I still use the word “gay” to mean “cheesy,” because I’m basically a child.]

I’m trying to download “Promises, Promises” by Generation X. Not because it’s a particularly good song but because it reminds me of a certain time period. Anyways I can’t find it anywhere so if you have this track I’ll trade you something for it. I don’t know what you’re into but I’ve got some Skatalites gems, a shitload of Motown, a grip of Elvis Costello and all the Dinah Washington you want.

Next weekend I have to go to my cousin’s wedding in Connecticut. Which is weird because he’s not really my cousin (long story) and I dislike Connecticut. No offense if you’re from there but like, I totally hate you.

Anyways I’m not really going to know anyone there except my parents. I picture myself sitting in the corner in my brown suit eating wedding cake while everyone else does the bunny-hop. I’ll eat it rapaciously, the way an unwatched animal eats. On the way home I’ll have to pull off of 95 and rob a convenience store just to balance things out.